moving out at 17?
what course do i want to take next year at college?
i need to start driving
i need to get out of lowestoft.
this is shit.
and the most confusing thing is 'you' believe it or not i am content with the way things are going, but i'm still questioning what will happen in the future? because yes i do want you to play a BIG part in this & there is nothing stopping you right? except from a minor thing in which i'm sure will stop any potential future i have with you. I do have a beautiful life, i'm surrounded by beauty and i extract beauty from the way people are.
i'm sitting myself on my bed listening to a great example of how i feel and what i need to be told.
Nobody said it was easy
Oh it's such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said it would be so hard
I'm going back to the start, if only it was possible to go back to the start right? to be younge again without fear or worry of what lie's ahead just the excitement of getting that stuffed toy in a happy meal, or waiting for your birthday cake to come with candles so you could wish for that toy you've been wanting and could hopefully get it on your next come around birthday. Birthday's always went quick with me as i'm 17 now and it only seems a few years ago that i was in the hairdressers down bevan street, and some woman had purple hair, as the hairdresser accidently turned it that colour obviously the woman was unaware of the accident until i shouted 'look, that lady has purple hair' turns out i was 5 when this occured. Everybody laughed as i was only a incident child, and now when i walk past that what was a hairdressers and is now a cafe all i can think of is how pleasent my childhood was. Don't get me wrong i experienced alot more pain then alot of other children but the way my mother has made up for this i can never fault her in anyway she tried her best. It's just a shame i can't say the same for the male figure in my life. it's such a shame how i dislike the person i am, the young aldult im suppose to be, and the person i am turning out to be. The way people treat others makes me feel sick. The way children are being classed as obese, the way aldults think they have a right to beat chrildren, i HATE the way were expected to turn a blind eye to the lack of help we have to locate people to specific jobs to meet there needs, or the way homeless people are left without care off others, we take our lifes for granted and yet other peoples lifes never seem to get easy. I'm sick of hearing silly little crimes which are being overrated on the new's as i'm bored of hearing bad things about this community, and everything else, were surrounded by beauty as i first said and i'd appreciate people understanding the true meaning of beauty to act upon in their life, this is not going to happen its just a mere unrealistic idea.
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